There was a time when I felt like the default manager of our home - the walking, talking calendar, the finder of all lost things, the person who knew everything so that everyone else could function.
I didn’t need more “help.” I needed a system.
I created a simple Family Responsibility Chart to really map out who was doing what so we could move from the gray area into a black and white system of shared responsibility.
This same list of tasks is mirrored inside the Maple app (“Our Shared Tasks” Folder).
The Chart is great for making a more permanent arrangement and the list of those same tasks inside the Maple app is great for updating on the fly.
Having a system is really what shifted the dynamic at home for us.
Here are the 5 rules that helped us reclaim our time, reduce resentment, and actually enjoy running a family together.
Rule 1: If I’m the only one who knows it needs to be done — it goes in Maple.
Invisible tasks used to live rent-free in my brain — school forms, birthday gifts, dentist appointments, field trip permission slips.
Now, every task gets captured in Maple.
When it’s written down, it becomes our responsibility, not mine alone.
Pro tip: Set recurring tasks for anything that happens monthly (like pet meds, bills, or teacher emails). Maple remembers so you don’t have to.
Rule 2: If it’s “our” house, it’s our responsibility.
In our house, we don’t use the word “help.”
You don’t “help” with laundry. You own laundry.
You don’t “help” with meals. You own the grocery planning.
Once we assigned clear ownership in Maple, the mental load finally lifted — because ownership creates accountability. I like to aim for both parents getting equal time to relax instead of a tit for tat 50/50 share.
Rule 3: I don’t answer questions that could’ve been answered in the shared calendar.
“What time’s soccer?” “When’s the dentist?” “What’s for dinner?” - my least favorite questions because someone (and I say someone now, because my partner uses this app as much as I do now) already did the work to put it there for all to see.
Now, we check Maple before we ask each other a schedule question.
It’s not about being rigid — it’s about not having to repeat the same information twenty times a week.
Pro tip: Use Maple’s shared calendar or link your Google Calendar — everyone stays synced, no mental bandwidth required.
Rule 4: I schedule downtime in the calendar.
There’s no gold medal for running yourself into the ground.
Rest isn’t earned — it’s essential maintenance.
Maple helped me see that if it doesn’t get scheduled, it doesn’t happen. So now, I block “Mamacita quiet time” and “no-plan Sundays” the same way I block meetings.
Rule 5: We talk about logistics before resentment.
We don’t wait for a meltdown to happen.
Every Sunday, we have a 10 minute check in- this is a perfect way to keep the resentment cobwebs out. Download my “Mom + Dad Meet Up” Agenda here.
These five rules aren’t magic - they’re muscle memory.
Systems don’t replace love, but they protect it.
And that’s what Maple gives families: a way to make invisible labor visible, share it fairly, and get back to what actually matters.
Related articles
Ready to get your family organized?
Bring clarity and calm to everyday family planning with one shared space for emails, events, tasks, and meal plans.
